Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
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She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
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HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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