Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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