She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
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He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
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For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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