is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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