Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
