Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize