There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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