I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize