You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize