i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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