Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ttyl tear gas
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He better not be in your backpack
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize