This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize