apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize