At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize