Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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