you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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