im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
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