And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize