i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize