I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize