If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
This baby is an asshole
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
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