oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
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