I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are two peas in an std pod
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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