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  • 66 26
    Submitted by Phys on May 13, 13 at 11:05am

    I love celebrating Thank God I'm Not (as far as I know) A Mother/Father Day!!

  • 72 60
    Submitted by cfreymarc on May 13, 13 at 10:18am

    You left out feeding a house full of cats.

    • 24 14
      Submitted by Kincaid333 on May 15, 13 at 11:25am

      such would imply being an old hag. are we speaking from a personal level here? if so don't forget about the dead one you left in the dryer.

  • 55 28
    Submitted by dmoney1234 on May 13, 13 at 10:15am

    That's about 12 wins I see there. Well done good sir/madam.

  • 48 24
    Submitted by ccastle on May 13, 13 at 11:56am

    The restaurant wouldn't give me a to-go cup for my margarita so I shoved the glass under my shirt and walked out.

  • 42 20
    Submitted by EpicE on May 13, 13 at 6:55pm

    Oh and more sex by the way.

  • 46 31
    Submitted by SmellyShorts on May 13, 13 at 11:39am

    We all die alone.

  • 32 19
    Submitted by ittybit420 on May 13, 13 at 10:49am

    amen

  • 28 17
    Submitted by dmp612 on May 13, 13 at 12:23pm

    Yes!

  • 36 34
    Submitted by thirrteen on May 13, 13 at 12:56pm

    Thanks. I didn't need that

  • 40 43
    Submitted by RoffMain on May 13, 13 at 11:19am

    You'll die alone.