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  • it was actually you getting pounded by 9 dudes throughout the night.

    Submitted by ssimkins89 on Jul 8, 10 at 8:12pm
  • If you fart vaseline then I'm sure you can go with 'horrible'

    Submitted by klangford on Jul 8, 10 at 8:47pm
  • none of them fit you! you should have bought the "Trojan Jr."...

    Submitted by jasboo on Jul 8, 10 at 8:18pm
  • @mandygirl: you're still a cunt and as much of a bitch as everyone thinks you are.

    Submitted by Brentman12 on Jul 8, 10 at 8:13pm
    • Look at how many thumbs down your "first" post has. Everyone thinks the idiot who calls "first" is a douchebag. Seriously, what the hell is the point? Do you win anything? Do you want a cookie or something? I may be a bitch, but I worked hard to earn the title. Your mom was born a cunt.

      Submitted by mandygirl on Jul 8, 10 at 8:28pm
      • You worked hard to earn your cunt? So you used to be a dude? That's not something to be proud of...

        Submitted by alias10 on Jul 9, 10 at 7:34am
        • Learn to read, douche2. I said I worked hard to earn the title of bitch. Now go suck your dad's dick.

          Submitted by mandygirl on Jul 11, 10 at 10:47am
  • @mandygirl: worked hard to become a bitch? What else comes with that title besides no one liking you? And can't see thumbs downs cause I use the iPhone app, and frankly don't give a shit.

    Submitted by Brentman12 on Jul 8, 10 at 9:12pm
    • And I should give a shit that you use the iPhone app? Does that make you special, or does the fact that you're mentally retarded do that for you?

      Submitted by mandygirl on Jul 11, 10 at 10:50am
  • @Mandygirl: does it kill you to see someone say first? No. It doesn't harm you at all. You sound like you're 12 throwing out cunt and douchebag like that. Grow up and don't be proud of being a bitch.

    Submitted by venusvsmars on Jul 8, 10 at 9:17pm
  • Perhaps you dreamed about fucking a car muffler? And, when you woke up you were exhausted! lol

    Submitted by sexyupsguy on Jul 8, 10 at 11:24pm
  • Arguing over the internet is like running in the special olympics; even if you win, you're still retarded.

    Submitted by magic_medicine on Jul 9, 10 at 12:04am
  • I would like to know why you still have the condoms in your bed? Riddle me this, does your asshole hurt..? If not, then it was a great night.

    Submitted by SippinSally on Jul 9, 10 at 12:01am
  • Ssimkins, that seems like it may be what happened:p and Mandy whatever you're an attention seeking whore for arguing with people you don't know on a fuckin app

    Submitted by RJenta on Jul 8, 10 at 9:35pm
  • This happens to me and Howard

    Submitted by imoldgregg on Jul 8, 10 at 9:08pm
  • Hahahha this is terrible

    Submitted by lovehayleyyy on Jul 8, 10 at 8:07pm
  • Hmm, this oddly reminds me of Goldilocks and the Three Bears...porn edition.

    Submitted by tennisgirl on Jul 8, 10 at 10:33pm
  • If your @ss doesn't hurt, and you aren't aching in new unmentionable places, don't worry about it.

    Submitted by AcaciaJules on Jul 10, 10 at 4:22am
  • FIRST to say this: There's a FIRST time for everything. She might have been your FIRST true love, and now you don't even remember. Or it could've been the FIRST time you drunkenly masturbated nine times. Perhaps you bought condoms too big? I remember the FIRST time I did that. My boyfriend was so ashamed and upset. That was the FIRST and last time I ever bought 'em. What nao bitch?

    Submitted by Briannaaaaa on Jul 8, 10 at 10:03pm
  • does your fart sound like a foghorn this morning? if so, then there's your answer...

    Submitted by buzzcutt on Jul 8, 10 at 10:16pm
  • Hey everybody I bring you much joy please if you please pound me nine time please! :3 8>

    Submitted by thatguy1020 on Jul 9, 10 at 3:41am
  • You sir, have been gang assraped.

    Submitted by marsho on Jul 9, 10 at 12:08am
  • HAAAAAAH!

    Submitted by rodenberger on Jul 8, 10 at 8:17pm
  • Had to be 856.... Lmao

    Submitted by pumpkin4305 on Jul 8, 10 at 11:31pm
  • Hold on to fond memories, feels good man.

    Submitted by SilverKnight on Jul 8, 10 at 8:09pm
  • Hahaha I love how all these are directed toward mandy. Poor girl I think arguing with douches on tfln is retarded too but she's right all the "first" people should be executed. It's annoying and from what I've seen most people feel this way.

    Submitted by hockeybabe on Jul 9, 10 at 10:18am
  • I was in that line to bang you.

    Submitted by Beachbum111 on Aug 19, 12 at 6:57am
  • Buzzcut omg

    Submitted by austinonymouss on Jul 9, 10 at 2:28am
  • did somebody fart? i smell burnt rubber

    Submitted by dbc69 on Jul 6, 11 at 4:25pm
  • This one was really hillarious.

    Submitted by LTChatman on Jul 9, 10 at 3:50am
  • 9 girls?

    Submitted by cmillss on Jul 9, 10 at 12:35am
  • Magic medicine that was a good one like five years ago. And a great girl would have meant you finding no condoms.

    Submitted by An0n on Jul 9, 10 at 2:10am
  • hahaha....I love the "first" posts cause they always start so much drama.....people take life way to seriously sometimes though. you gotta learn to laugh at the stupidity of the "first" post. it's great.

    Submitted by looger on Jul 9, 10 at 3:33am
  • I miss u nj.

    Submitted by pimpstatus on Jul 8, 10 at 10:50pm
  • Sounds like a good time to me dude! \nAnd to all the douches arguing on this post: really?

    Submitted by stephcyanide on Jul 9, 10 at 6:10pm
  • That is so amazing=]

    Submitted by chastine on Jul 8, 10 at 9:53pm
  • Lol @ sexyupsguy

    Submitted by boolou on Jul 9, 10 at 3:26am
  • @ Briannaaaaa, you fail.... Terribly. You probably took so long planning out your witty "FIRST" comment, that clearly you became second. So sad... Not. :/

    Submitted by elite on Jul 9, 10 at 3:36am
  • South Jersey girls are the greatest period. Hold on to her.

    Submitted by SundayDrive on Jul 8, 10 at 8:38pm
  • Perhaps it was a massive orgy, or maybe you met nine awesome girls, or possibly some dude REALLY likes you.

    Submitted by MrK on Jul 8, 10 at 10:40pm
  • Haha I remember the FIRST time that happened to me :)

    Submitted by Brentman12 on Jul 8, 10 at 8:04pm
    • You're still a douchebag and not nearly as sly as you think.

      Submitted by mandygirl on Jul 8, 10 at 8:06pm
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