it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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