Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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