I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize