Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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