we're blogging at a bar
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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