a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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