Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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