Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize