That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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