Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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