Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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