masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize