Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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