is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize