At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize