with your own penis?
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize