i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
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