i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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