Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize