Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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