When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize