i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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