i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Randomize