I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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