Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I came so hard my ears popped.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize