I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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